It has come to our attention, dear Macaroni reader, that there is a major threat to your welfare. Usually our archivist department would handle such a threat to your survival, but currently, the archivist is investigating the effects of senioritis, a deadly disease that has been plaguing Greenville since its founding. So I, your loyal kitchenette intern, am bringing you news of this bane to your existence.
It has come to our attention that our super-legit trademark patent thingy has been violated. By our understanding our super-legit trademark patent thingy works by saying that no other people are allowed to use our awesome name or take our stuff, and it has come to our attention that someone is using our awesome name and may or may not be taking our stuff. There is another website out there claiming to be the real Macaroni Report, but this is a lie; we are the real Macaroni Report, just as the white-bearded man you see in modern KFC commercials is the real Colonel Sanders.
This blasphemous website has been known to show up before our prestigious website in google searches (proving once and for all that yes, google does take bribes). Don’t believe its lies! If wordpress is not in the web address, then this website is not our legit and esteemed news website. This is totally a violation of our super-legit trademark patent thingy and we are probably definitely going to bring this to a super-legit court sometime, if that’s how these things work (any reports that our super-legit trademark patent thingy is forged are complete BS. That Han Solo signature is totally real, and he totally gives out patents). Don’t believe their lies! Even though they claim to have been founded in 2013 , which was before we were established, we were here first! They must be lying, and they stole our awesome name!
This fake Macaroni Report is actually just a Facebook forum to discuss macaroni & cheese. It literally just posts random crap about macaroni & cheese. We here at the Macaroni Report loves some good macaroni and cheese, but we would not create a cheesy (see what I did there?) Facebook group about it. They have even copied our own great idea and created a blog, though it is on a much crappier website named blogspot. Luckily the idiots who founded this ripoff company aren’t very popular, seeing as they’ve only been able to acquire 53 likes. Pitiful.
Do not fall for their evil imposter ways. The idea that you can combine Mac & Cheese with just anything is a blasphemy to a delicious food. Remember that we are the Real Macaroni Report.