Macaroni Critique: Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy (movie)

Better have your towel


This movie was something else, dear readers. Many people were fans of the Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy in book form, but this movie received mixed reviews when it released in 2005. What went wrong? What went right? Don’t panic readers, I’m here to tell you all about it. In this Macaroni Critique I’ll look at some of the various elements of this beautiful disaster.


This movie contains some familiar faces giving some very oddly directed performances. The cast includes Bilbo Baggins in a bathrobe, Mos Def, that one girl from Elf, that one guy from Iron Man 2 as a guy with 2 heads, and Professor Severus Snape stuffed into a large metal trash can. The low point is Jess Day’s performance, as her acting is rather alien, even for a movie about aliens. The highlight is Snape’s performance, as his character’s mood mirrors my personal feelings while watching this movie: deep sadness and disappointment.

John Malkovich also appears as John Malkovich, and Davy Jones appears, looking much less tentacley than he did in Pirates of the Caribbean.

Special Effects/Character Design:

In the book, the Vogons are gross, pathetic, and unlikable creatures. And Douglas Adams did a hell of a job describing them as such.

In the movie, the Vogons are gross, pathetic, and unlikable creatures. And the filmmakers did a hell of a job portraying them as such.

The Vogon Guards dressed in… well you can see
Prostetnic Vogon Jeltz reads poetry to Brother Sam and John Watson






The only problem is that the Vogons were a only small part of the book, but the filmmakers (and the books author) decided that these amazing creatures needed a bigger role.

So for a majority of the film viewers have the opportunity to stare at these lovely, high-nosed, gimps (like seriously, what are they wearing?)

And I don’t really care if Douglas Adams made this decision for the movie, I feel it’s a bad decision.

The spaceships look rather cheesy, but the Hitchhiker’s Guide animations are pretty nice to look at.


“So Long and Thanks for All the Fish” is so terribly catchy, cheesy, and a fittingly bizarre opening for the film. Singing animals are usually a plus, but dolphins are always a minus. So singing dolphins are neutral. I hate/love the song.


The story is very similar to the book, making many great representations of the story’s key moments (minus the whale crater, because that would’ve been inhumane to recreate). Like I said, the Vogons feel overused for this movie, but I suppose Hollywood likes to have a villain, no matter how grotesque.

The love story between Ms. Edmunds and Morgan Freeman’s whiter cousin feels a little forced, especially since the former has an aforementioned bizarre performance overall.

Guy Fleegman’s portrayal of Zaphod Beeblebrox doesn’t follow the book character’s demeanor at all. Book-Zaphod is selfish and impatient, but he isn’t an idiot. Movie-Zaphod is dumb, erratic, and chauvinistic, which ruins his character’s importance to the plot.


macaroni critique hitchhikers
I give this movie 27.5/42 bowls of Macaroni

This movie is hardly perfect, and as a fan of the book some parts of it are upsetting. It’s still enjoyable in some odd way, after all, it’s not a bad movie. But hey, that’s just my opinion.

Second Opinion:

I don’t know anything about reviewing movies, so my rating is hardly well calculated. I asked the local Archivist, a huge fan of the Hitchhiker’s Guide series, what he thought of the movie and he had this to say:

“I liked the movie. I was okay with the changes they made to the story, because Douglas Adams was involved and made those decisions himself. The movie still matches the authors vision. And the actors performances were great”

So hey, maybe I don’t know what I’m talking about.

What am I saying? Of course I do! I’m a critic

–With an upturned nose,

Pretentious Critic #12

Macaroni Critique: Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy (movie)

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