In surprise turn of events, Mr. Thela adopts wayward egg

Breaking News!!! Mr. Thela has acquired a mysterious egg under mysterious circumstances in his room. It’s a total mystery as to how in the hell that egg got there!

As many well know, about a month ago, some strange occurrences began to happen in Mr. Thela’s room. Oddly enough, socks started to appear in his room. And not just normal socks, these socks appear to be children’s socks with bright colorful things on them such as koalas and bunnies. The reason for these socks appearing in Mr. Thela’s room is unknown. The perpetrator or perpetrators responsible are unknown. Why Mr. Thela hasn’t yet taken to wearing these socks is unknown. But basically these things started appearing and are still showing up.

But in a dramatic new turn of events, an EGG has showed up in Thela’s room. So far, Thela, unable to determine if the egg is hard-boiled or potentially holds something alive within, has taken on the role of doting father to said egg. Already, rumors have spread that Thela could be spotted cooing at the egg 6th period, and in his 8th period class, sources have confirmed that Thela was most definitely crocheting the egg a nice warm-knit sweater. A picture of a grinning Thela holding the egg up next to him has already been spotted on his wall – and at the bottom, “Brian & Wallace” can be seen written in hot pink pen.

So it seems that Thela has against all odds ended up as the father to an egg which could hold anything from a presumed extinct dinosaur to Sunday’s breakfast. Only time will tell which is the case. And we’re serious here, that thing may start to smell soon. Of course we hope it doesn’t, for it’d break Thela’s adorable little heart to have to throw Wallace away.

Many mysteries remain, one such mystery being if the person who left the egg and the person who left (and seems to be continuing to leave) the socks are the same person. Could these socks be meant to serve as an adorable egg sleeve for the equally adorable Wallace? Or could the sock perpetrator merely have inspired others to unleash as much cute and cuddly mayhem and anarchy as he/she has? Stay tuned folks, it can only get weirder from here.

Eat Responsibly. But don’t eat Wallace.

-Kitchenette Intern

In surprise turn of events, Mr. Thela adopts wayward egg

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